Behind The Scenes - A Hard Look At What Needs To Go

Jen Lang: 00:00:08

This is no halos here hosted by Jen Lang and Jane

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Stark, the place to inspire a change in your consciousness to

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elevate the world. We're to heart centered business owners

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nourishing our inner rebels while growing our respective

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businesses.

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No halos here is the result of bringing together an

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opera singer turn spiritual mentor and a marketing

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professional turned well being coached to meditate daily.

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Together we unite physical, mental, emotional and spiritual

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energies into a powerful presence to lead, heal and

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inspire. We love exploring the shadowed edges of life, the

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universe and beyond through honest and thought provoking

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conversations. Let's dive in.

Jen Lang: 00:00:45

Hi, everybody. Welcome back to another episode of no

Jen Lang: 00:00:48

halos here with Jen Lang and Jane Stark. Whoo. We're happy.

Jane Stark: 00:00:53

I know you're booted again.

Jen Lang: 00:00:54

I read it again. It's so funny two weeks in a row.

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I've never heard you boot other than

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last week.

Jane Stark: 00:01:01

Last weekend today. We talk a lot. I've never heard

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the boot. I know what I was thinking to boot up. It's

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maybe it's because I'm doing more singing. Maybe

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interfaculty it. So today, we've got kind of a special episode,

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we want to give you a little bit of behind the scenes in the

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world of Jen and Jane.

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Yeah, we were talking about we have lots of

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different topics outlined. And oftentimes, so let's let's dive

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right into behind the scenes. Yeah, oftentimes, when Jen and I

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are going to record, we have a list of topics. But we for us

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feel like we really need to be in the moment. And we need to

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feel the energy of what we want to talk about. And so it's an

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oftentimes, we'll be chatting earlier in the week, we record

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on Thursdays, and we'll be chatting earlier in the weekend,

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like, Oh, we got to bring this to the podcast. And then I find

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we get to Thursday to our recording day. And I'm like, oh,

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okay, the energy of that topic is not here right now. So then

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we kind of go through and we're like, okay, like, what feels

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juicy or what feels like relatively like for now. And so

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that's kind of how we came to where we're at today where none

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of the topics that we kind of had felt, right? And then we're

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like, why don't we just give a little bit of a behind the

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scenes and a share as to what's going on for us in our lives and

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how this energy is landing for us right now.

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And also some of the tools that we use. So yeah, it

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basically came out of while Jane and I were talking and trying to

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figure out a topic, I sort of shuffled one of my tarot decks.

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And I was like, oh, but you know what, maybe this didn't just

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give us a little bit of a boost or a little bit of guidance as

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to what we want to bring to you all of you today. And the card

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that popped out was the Eight of Pentacles. From and this is from

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the light Sears Tarot by krisanne. And basically, the

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card is a picture of a woman sitting on an office type chair.

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And there in front of her, she's holding a candle. And then in

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front of her all these different things. So there's different

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bowls of things. There's paperwork, there's books,

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there's another candle, there's a feather and plant and all this

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kind of stuff. So just I was like It felt really reflective

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of what each of us has going on right now. For Jane and I and

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also the the eight Pentacles above are also represented as

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cycles of the moon. So there's two aspects to bring in. And as

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both we've just come off this really big full moon and Leo

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Jana and I both had, I'm going to say different but similar

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different experiences, but similar realizations. Out of

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this Full Moon energy

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would be often the case for us. Yes, definitely.

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Very, I mean it. I always find that fascinating with us and our

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relationship to because we live fairly different lives. But yet

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we have a lot of similar themes play out

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in very different ways. Yeah. So yeah. And but

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always providing experiences for growth. And then we can talk

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about it with each other. And yeah, you know,

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through amazing,

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I love it. Me too.

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So why don't we just kind of make this like, let's

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just dive in and chat a little bit about what's going on for

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us. So, like, what's kind of going on with the big picture of

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life for you right now and some of the themes that you're seeing

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play out.

Jen Lang: 00:04:25

So I think some of the big picture themes that I'm

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seeing play out is for me an old habit around over scheduling

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myself. And this has been a I'm gonna say, an adulthood lifelong

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habit or pattern that's come out of overachievement and being

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busy. A lot of I was definitely where the busy badge of honor

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from university onwards. And it was this. I think it grew out of

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this needing to both prove aspects of self like working

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hard doing full time courses and how Been holding a part time job

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while at university. And then, you know, getting into music

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later on in life and the demands of that schedule of working part

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time and studying music. full time, part time. That's

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definitely big. So for this week, it's been this multitude

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of activities. And I've definitely I definitely take

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pride in my multi passionate nature and my interest across

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all many, many topics. I'm very curious, constantly curious on

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my own. Why that is. And I wonder why that is. And even

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walking the dogs in the morning. I'm just like, why that plant is

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doing that right now? What is it about that location, you know,

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just the always wondering and inquisitive mind piece. So I

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think that also partly leads to the overscheduling. But then I

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also need to read, I think, be more respectful of my energy

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levels. And some of this came in an earlier conversation that

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Jane and I had around, it was a little bit about boundaries, but

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it was related to my schedule, where when I'm working with my

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calendar, and my schedule, I'm conscious about time and energy

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and blocking off time and space. But it's in the moments where

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someone asks for, say, a reschedule or a, you know, like,

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Hey, can we just move this here? Or I think in your case, Janet

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was like, Do you have time for five minute chat? Those types of

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conversations that leak into our day to day lives, but ended up

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end up costing you more energetically than just that

Jen Lang: 00:06:33

five minute conversation? Yeah, that's what's happening for me

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right now.

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Another one that I noticed for me, is, is the

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device. And I don't want to go down the rabbit like, yeah, not

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going on the path of talking about boundaries and devices,

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specifically, but I also noticed that that's a leaky boundary for

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me where, you know, if I have like, say, two hours where I

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don't have calls or meetings in the afternoon, and I'm like,

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Okay, I'm gonna take that time I need to eat, I maybe need to

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rest or do a quick workout or stretch or something. And then

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all of a sudden, you know, my phone dings. And then I've just

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spent 10 minutes, you know, because then that puts me on to

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my phone, which then I'm like, I'll check my email quickly, or

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I'll check this. And then, like that leaky boundary, too. And

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then all of a sudden, it's like, oh, half an hour is gone of my

Jane Stark: 00:07:20

two hours that I had. Yeah. So sorry, to go back to this for

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you. That's what's been really,

Jen Lang: 00:07:27

I think that's just what's been coming up and

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showing up. And what's interesting is that I've taken

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out a couple of activities in the past couple of months that

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have met, my evenings are more free now. And I'm really

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enjoying that I'm really, really enjoying that. Because before,

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like, I would work. And then I would have an activity three,

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sometimes four nights a week. And I think up until September,

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I was doing karate three or four times a week, either mornings or

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evenings. And it just became, just became too much on the

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schedule. And I wasn't now that I know what it's like to like,

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oh, I can just be home and Kirk and I can like watch a show

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together. Or we'll have dinner and cook dinner together, which

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we didn't have as much time for before. So that's part of that

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leaky boundary piece. Then what else is unfolding? It's, I'm

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seeing this unfold a bit with clients with some clients

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around. Not like allowing their practices that keep them

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centered and grounded to also leak or fall away. I've seen

Jen Lang: 00:08:34

that really cool this week. Yeah. So the stuff that and

Jen Lang: 00:08:38

you've seen it too, this week? Yeah,

Jane Stark: 00:08:39

me too. Yeah. Well, I was saying to you the other

Jane Stark: 00:08:41

day, I've noticed that I, I am being very conscious, or having

Jane Stark: 00:08:47

to be very conscious about keeping them in and doing them.

Jane Stark: 00:08:51

And I'm in a space right now where they almost feel a little

Jane Stark: 00:08:54

bit like chores. Yeah. So but I'm having to Yeah, I think I

Jane Stark: 00:08:58

was messaging you the other night, I went out for a walk at

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like seven o'clock because I literally I was like, I've been

Jane Stark: 00:09:03

in my house all day, like working, parenting doing

Jane Stark: 00:09:08

whatever, maybe I left to drive somebody somewhere, but like,

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and I was like, the last thing I really felt like doing was

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putting on my jacket and going like outside. And yet I was like

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just put one foot in front of the other and get out and just

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walk the dog even for half an hour and yeah, so being in that

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space where it's really easy to not do the thing but I'm I know

Jane Stark: 00:09:28

now the importance of keeping those those practices in place

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and sometimes so I think you know, sometimes you do have to

Jane Stark: 00:09:36

do them even when they don't feel maybe good. Like it feels

Jane Stark: 00:09:40

like another thing on the to do list.

Jen Lang: 00:09:43

Well that's a that's an interesting nuance because of

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course you know I we always talk about going without feeling and

Jen Lang: 00:09:49

the fine in the moment, but sometimes you have to override

Jen Lang: 00:09:53

that. Like I

Jane Stark: 00:09:55

knew today. Yeah. I just because I knew I would feel

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better after and as soon as I was out. I was like, okay, yeah,

Jane Stark: 00:10:01

I totally need this. But yeah, having to kind of push and know

Jane Stark: 00:10:05

what's, what's good for you, even though I was tired and had

Jane Stark: 00:10:09

a busy day, sorry, yesterday,

Jen Lang: 00:10:10

I was gonna say if I didn't have that online yoga

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date with a girl, a good friend of mine. And normally we sort

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of, you know, lately we've been doing different online yoga

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classes, and, you know, quite enjoying them. Anyway, she sent

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me a link yesterday to this one that I was like, I was so

Jen Lang: 00:10:26

resistant to this just feeling I was feeling cranky and feisty

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and didn't get addressed. It was like, it was definitely not

Jen Lang: 00:10:34

something that I was excited to do. And if I hadn't had that

Jen Lang: 00:10:37

date with a friend, I would not have done the class, I didn't

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feel like doing it. I just wanted to wrap my day up. And at

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the same time, even though I didn't love the class, I didn't

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love the format of the way these teachers had brought the

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routine. I'm like, Look, if I wanted to join a gym, I would

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have joined a gym, I want to do a yoga class where I hear the

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cues. And I hear the instructor talking, but this one just had

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music playing. And you had to constantly look at the screen to

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see what they were doing. And I'm so glad I did because I felt

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clear headed afterwards. So even though I didn't love the

Jen Lang: 00:11:12

experience of the new class, I still appreciated the shift in

Jen Lang: 00:11:16

energy that I brought for me. So that's kind of just where we're

Jen Lang: 00:11:20

at.

Jane Stark: 00:11:21

Yeah, yeah. And I mean, I think like we were

Jane Stark: 00:11:24

saying the beginning for me, it's showing up in very

Jane Stark: 00:11:27

different ways. I've realized the my old pattern that has

Jane Stark: 00:11:30

shown up again, is, is the being superhuman. I've taken on and

Jane Stark: 00:11:37

rescuing and rescuing and feeling like I can fix everyone.

Jane Stark: 00:11:41

So there's some codependence there that I'm very aware of

Jane Stark: 00:11:47

like that, yeah, if I can fix everyone, or if I can be there

Jane Stark: 00:11:50

to make sure everyone's okay, then I'll be okay. And right,

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that pattern of like I can do, it all has shown up. And I am

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grateful that I'm recognizing it sooner than I had in the past.

Jane Stark: 00:12:05

So I can course correct. And I've had a number of a number of

Jane Stark: 00:12:10

really big signs from the universe, that I need to switch

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gears, I need to slow down, I can't be doing as much as I'm

Jane Stark: 00:12:17

doing. And it's, it's interesting, because it's a new

Jane Stark: 00:12:21

layer. And it is one of those things where it's like, Oh, my

Jane Stark: 00:12:23

God, I thought I dealt with this, like this is really here

Jane Stark: 00:12:26

again. But it is in a different way. I'm a different person this

Jane Stark: 00:12:31

time. Yeah, I'm seeing it as like a really big and so much.

Jane Stark: 00:12:35

So many signs. So many things, cards I've pulled and whatnot

Jane Stark: 00:12:38

are all kind of pointing for me that like a big life transition

Jane Stark: 00:12:42

changes happening here again. But yeah, you know, I mean, the

Jane Stark: 00:12:46

other day, I thought I cracked my tooth from clenching my teeth

Jane Stark: 00:12:50

at night. Wow, thank goodness, it's not fully cracked. But

Jane Stark: 00:12:54

yeah, I did have kind of I did have a little fracture in it,

Jane Stark: 00:12:57

that they were able to just touch up and fill. But the irony

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and the, you know, like that day when I was like, Okay, I'm

Jane Stark: 00:13:05

literally like, literally cracking under the pressure that

Jane Stark: 00:13:08

I put on myself. And so that's what, yeah, this Full Moon

Jane Stark: 00:13:13

really highlighted that for me. And then, you know, and then

Jane Stark: 00:13:17

actually on the full moon, basically, you know, we got some

Jane Stark: 00:13:20

information about one of my daughters, that is actually

Jane Stark: 00:13:26

really good and helpful information, however, also is

Jane Stark: 00:13:30

really requiring me to take a deep, deep look at what I'm

Jane Stark: 00:13:36

doing and how I want to show up. And just why and where some of

Jane Stark: 00:13:42

my struggles come from. And so yeah, it's an it's that message

Jane Stark: 00:13:47

like, is just slow down, slow down, and what is really

Jane Stark: 00:13:53

important.

Jen Lang: 00:13:54

Yeah, what is essential, I was gonna say, a

Jen Lang: 00:13:57

tie back to the card that we just drew for this, it is this,

Jen Lang: 00:14:00

we have so many choices in front of us and so many different

Jen Lang: 00:14:03

directions and so many stimuli, that it can be really difficult

Jen Lang: 00:14:08

to choose that one path and I'm definitely being called to like,

Jen Lang: 00:14:11

I'm not saying it has to be just one path, but I'm being called,

Jen Lang: 00:14:14

specifically out of this Full Moon this week to really track

Jen Lang: 00:14:17

down and focus in on what are the activities, what are the

Jen Lang: 00:14:21

what are the essentials that will move me and us forward, you

Jen Lang: 00:14:26

know, for what we're creating together? Yeah, stop letting my

Jen Lang: 00:14:30

energy so be dispersed in so many different directions that,

Jen Lang: 00:14:34

you know, like the saying goes well, and

Jane Stark: 00:14:36

yeah, like we're and we're both in that right. I

Jane Stark: 00:14:38

think we're both would say like we're multi passionate people.

Jane Stark: 00:14:42

And again, it shows up in different ways. We have very

Jane Stark: 00:14:46

different lifestyles, but and I and you know, it's a question. I

Jane Stark: 00:14:51

don't have the answer right now, but it's something that's come

Jane Stark: 00:14:53

up in my mind too, as as a multi passionate person. How do how do

Jane Stark: 00:14:58

we navigate this way because yeah, I know from my life right

Jane Stark: 00:15:01

now and the things that I have on my plate, having this many

Jane Stark: 00:15:05

balls in the air is not good. It doesn't like it's not serving me

Jane Stark: 00:15:08

and it's not serving my family and it's not serving us and our

Jane Stark: 00:15:10

business exam. So, you know, even I want I'm like, I think we

Jane Stark: 00:15:14

talked about that a little bit and what we're doing.

Jen Lang: 00:15:19

So do you want to break that down for your for our

Jen Lang: 00:15:22

listeners, because obviously, we can sit here and say, We're

Jen Lang: 00:15:24

multi passionate, but maybe I can talk about, you know, I have

Jen Lang: 00:15:27

a recital coming up in two weeks, that will be live

Jen Lang: 00:15:30

streamed. And so I've been unpacking how I learned music,

Jen Lang: 00:15:33

again, go into rehearsals, practicing again, I've found I

Jen Lang: 00:15:36

was, I'm still am fitting into practicing where and when I can

Jen Lang: 00:15:41

instead of making my part of my day, and even though I put the

Jen Lang: 00:15:45

times in my calendar, usually by the time that time comes around,

Jen Lang: 00:15:49

I'm too tired. to, to, that's when that multi passionate piece

Jen Lang: 00:15:54

comes in. I can't even imagine if I'd said yes to karate as

Jen Lang: 00:15:57

well. Like, yeah, that's just I'd be, I'd be sick.

Jane Stark: 00:16:01

So yeah, and I mean, and I've got, you know, Jen and

Jane Stark: 00:16:05

I are building, what we're building here together, we each

Jane Stark: 00:16:08

still have our own things. So you also still have your own

Jane Stark: 00:16:12

clients and your own work that way. And, and sort of why. And

Jane Stark: 00:16:18

you've got your areas that you practicing and study like and

Jane Stark: 00:16:22

your you know, like your practice, I'm thinking with a

Jane Stark: 00:16:25

sale.

Jen Lang: 00:16:26

A sale? Yeah. Um, so I'm still working on some of

Jen Lang: 00:16:28

that. Yeah, so you've got personal development pieces

Jen Lang: 00:16:32

first.

Jane Stark: 00:16:33

And so those are choices, their choices, but

Jane Stark: 00:16:35

that's also a part of you. And a part of the work you do, right.

Jane Stark: 00:16:39

Yeah. And for me, what that looks like is I have a family.

Jane Stark: 00:16:45

You know, I have, I actually still have a marketing business

Jane Stark: 00:16:48

that I'm working in, I have my own coaching practice. And I

Jane Stark: 00:16:52

have what we're doing. And I have, oh, yeah, and I'm part

Jane Stark: 00:16:56

time homeschooling a child. Right? So it just asked for all

Jane Stark: 00:17:01

of a sudden, I was like, This is This is unreal, this is the

Jane Stark: 00:17:03

superhuman part of myself. And this is, the pattern is very

Jane Stark: 00:17:07

clear to me. Were I back in the fall. Last year, we homeschooled

Jane Stark: 00:17:12

her, and my husband was home full time, and he took it on

Jane Stark: 00:17:15

this year, he's gone back to work. And I stepped up and said,

Jane Stark: 00:17:19

Okay, I can reduce my work time, I can fit my work into less

Jane Stark: 00:17:24

time. And I'll take it on. And I'll work with her because it's

Jane Stark: 00:17:26

only part time she also attends an Outdoor School. But what I've

Jane Stark: 00:17:31

realized is, I'm not superhuman. And it's eerily similar to nine

Jane Stark: 00:17:39

years ago when she was born, and my husband was took on a job

Jane Stark: 00:17:43

where he had to travel for work. And I was fairly new, I was

Jane Stark: 00:17:47

about two or three years into my own marketing business. And I

Jane Stark: 00:17:50

had two toddlers, right. And so it didn't work. I like I

Jane Stark: 00:17:55

couldn't, I couldn't do it all with what was with what I had on

Jane Stark: 00:17:58

my plate. So anyways, so that's sort of the, but it's a child, I

Jane Stark: 00:18:03

like I actually really enjoy the marketing, I enjoy the strategy

Jane Stark: 00:18:06

I enjoy the people I work with over there. I love the coaching.

Jane Stark: 00:18:09

I love the work that we're doing. Obviously, I love my

Jane Stark: 00:18:12

family and my kids, and I want to see the best. So it's, it is

Jane Stark: 00:18:16

hard. And I think I'm at this crossroads of like you were

Jane Stark: 00:18:19

saying like bringing narrowing that focus and layout. Yes,

Jane Stark: 00:18:23

there's all these things. And yes, I enjoy a whole bunch of

Jane Stark: 00:18:26

them in different aspects of them. However.

Jen Lang: 00:18:31

So a question might be, it's easy to say no to the

Jen Lang: 00:18:35

stuff that doesn't let you up. It's less easy to say no to the

Jen Lang: 00:18:39

stuff that lights you up, but doesn't necessarily move you

Jen Lang: 00:18:42

forward at this time.

Jane Stark: 00:18:44

Yeah. And seeing the

Jen Lang: 00:18:48

I say that as much for myself as for anybody else that

Jen Lang: 00:18:50

listen, that is

Jane Stark: 00:18:52

that is like the crux and you hit the nail on the

Jane Stark: 00:18:54

head. I think that is the hard part for a lot of us when we

Jane Stark: 00:18:57

have all these great things going. Yeah. But again, we're

Jane Stark: 00:19:01

split, like in so many different ways. And that's kind of where

Jane Stark: 00:19:08

I'm at right now. And oh, and I was sorry, I was gonna say again

Jane Stark: 00:19:12

to sort of share with how that's playing out. So back in the set

Jane Stark: 00:19:18

like August, September, I think it was Jeff and I decided that

Jane Stark: 00:19:22

well, we still each have our own businesses. We wanted to make

Jane Stark: 00:19:26

what we were building together a focus and a priority. And so we

Jane Stark: 00:19:29

both sort of said to each other Yeah, we're going to, that's

Jane Stark: 00:19:32

where we're going to focus our energy and that will almost act

Jane Stark: 00:19:36

as, say the funnel into our own like, yeah, there's still an

Jane Stark: 00:19:40

option to work with us one on one. But we knew at that time

Jane Stark: 00:19:43

that by us trying to segment our energy into building our own

Jane Stark: 00:19:46

personal individual practices plus building what we were

Jane Stark: 00:19:48

building together didn't make sense. And it was just splicing

Jane Stark: 00:19:52

everything. Yeah, we made that choice. I think now, for me, I

Jane Stark: 00:19:57

know I'm at this point of having to look at I'd like to say the

Jane Stark: 00:20:01

things that light me up, but I need to let go of because I've

Jane Stark: 00:20:05

had so much on my plate that I haven't been able to show up for

Jane Stark: 00:20:09

what we're doing together in the way that I want to, and in the

Jane Stark: 00:20:12

way that what we're building together needs me to. And this

Jane Stark: 00:20:17

is the also, the beautiful blessing of a partnership, Jen

Jane Stark: 00:20:21

has had a little bit more capacity and has been able to

Jane Stark: 00:20:24

step up and keep things moving and going and brought two

Jane Stark: 00:20:27

clients into our first program. And I'm so grateful for that.

Jane Stark: 00:20:31

Yeah. And it's been a really good lesson again of like, okay,

Jane Stark: 00:20:37

what is possible? And what, what really, is the thing that I want

Jane Stark: 00:20:42

to build and grow?

Jen Lang: 00:20:44

And what, what do we want to focus on, which, again,

Jen Lang: 00:20:46

is such an easy question to ask, but not necessarily an easy one

Jen Lang: 00:20:50

to implement. Unless, you know, unless you've chosen a field, or

Jen Lang: 00:20:55

we're a business or direction, that it's a single thing that

Jen Lang: 00:20:59

lights you up to no end. And, you know, in which case, the

Jen Lang: 00:21:05

world needs all kinds of people, we need multi passionate people,

Jen Lang: 00:21:08

and we need people who are focused on specific paths. So

Jen Lang: 00:21:16

the multi passionate piece ties in where we are essentially

Jen Lang: 00:21:20

creatives. And we have to decide so all of our different fields

Jen Lang: 00:21:26

feed into each other. And I'd like you know, even before we

Jen Lang: 00:21:29

did this partnership, I had two different businesses going on. I

Jen Lang: 00:21:32

had Jen Lang, right speaking coaching, and I had Jen Lang, I

Jen Lang: 00:21:35

had sound body sphere, which was the sound healing. And it took

Jen Lang: 00:21:38

me a long time for those to meld those two together and be like,

Jen Lang: 00:21:41

you know, what, these can all live under one space. Jen Lang

Jen Lang: 00:21:45

sound healer and voice coach and speaking presence coach, you

Jen Lang: 00:21:49

know, it's, it's kind of all in one, voice activator, still

Jen Lang: 00:21:53

deciding on the terminology. But it's, I think, similar to you,

Jen Lang: 00:21:57

Jane, where you had the marketing and the health

Jen Lang: 00:21:58

coaching, yeah, you've had those two pieces, and you still have

Jen Lang: 00:22:02

your marketing and your one to one clients are still they come

Jen Lang: 00:22:05

in through the door of health coaching, but, you know, we have

Jen Lang: 00:22:08

our healing. This is also why what we co create is so

Jen Lang: 00:22:11

powerful, because we can put all of our multi passionate talents

Jen Lang: 00:22:15

under one roof.

Jane Stark: 00:22:16

Absolutely. And it's not. And I think that's the

Jane Stark: 00:22:18

other place is coming to like, it's not necessarily like

Jane Stark: 00:22:21

letting something go, we're like, Okay, I have to let

Jane Stark: 00:22:24

marketing go. And I'm just going to be in coaching. Because what

Jane Stark: 00:22:26

we're also seeing you and I is our roles in this, this

Jane Stark: 00:22:31

partnership together, right? And I can see and we're seeing where

Jane Stark: 00:22:35

I get to bring my marketing brain and my strategic brain to

Jane Stark: 00:22:39

what we're doing. So what if I can shift that focus, so I'm

Jane Stark: 00:22:43

still having these, you know, I can still be in there coaching

Jane Stark: 00:22:48

and practicing, like, in that sense, and doing the energy

Jane Stark: 00:22:51

healing and all this beautiful stuff that we do together, and I

Jane Stark: 00:22:54

can exercise my strategic marketing brain? And that's the

Jane Stark: 00:22:59

beauty of it. So I think, yeah, one of the answers is, it's

Jane Stark: 00:23:03

finding, it's figuring out how those things can coexist in

Jane Stark: 00:23:08

harmony versus against each other. And I've been in this

Jane Stark: 00:23:12

place where I, it's felt a little bit more like a battle

Jane Stark: 00:23:15

for my energy, everything needs my energy, and how can I bring

Jane Stark: 00:23:19

those together is sort of is one piece of it. Another piece of it

Jane Stark: 00:23:25

is just also though, what do I have to say no to to just create

Jane Stark: 00:23:28

that space. Especially, you know, knowing that that's the

Jane Stark: 00:23:33

message I'm getting at home is just I need, I need a little

Jane Stark: 00:23:37

more space, I need to be able to support, you know, at home in a

Jane Stark: 00:23:42

different way.

Jen Lang: 00:23:43

So that's a really good, like place to sort of

Jen Lang: 00:23:47

pause and go, you know, you can get to a level of where you've

Jen Lang: 00:23:51

transmuted something that, you know, you talked about your

Jen Lang: 00:23:55

health event nine years ago, where you couldn't do it all and

Jen Lang: 00:23:59

your body was like, nope. And then, you know, now you

Jen Lang: 00:24:02

recognize the signs earlier. And like, similar to me with my

Jen Lang: 00:24:04

overscheduling, I've recognized I was like, Oh, I'm just not I

Jen Lang: 00:24:08

don't have capacity for this. And it's just, it doesn't mean

Jen Lang: 00:24:11

that like, one and done, I've dealt with that thing. It's

Jen Lang: 00:24:14

never going to come back again. It's that you've like you said,

Jen Lang: 00:24:18

You're the new you a different person than you were nine years

Jen Lang: 00:24:22

ago, just like we all were. And that is just another layer and

Jen Lang: 00:24:26

another level to unpack, unfold, discard, and it'll probably go

Jen Lang: 00:24:30

faster. And now we can recognize it for talking about it to the

Jen Lang: 00:24:33

public. So that was kind of cool. And that whole note, what

Jen Lang: 00:24:37

do you have to say no to? It's hard to say no to the things

Jen Lang: 00:24:40

that you love. And I think this also ties back to our Episode

Jen Lang: 00:24:43

Two episodes ago when we're talking about happiness and

Jen Lang: 00:24:46

fulfillment. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And sometimes they can code.

Jen Lang: 00:24:50

Sometimes they coexist in an activity and sometimes they

Jen Lang: 00:24:52

don't. Yeah. And so how do you choose or rank which activities

Jen Lang: 00:24:58

no matter what they are, whether they're paid or family or

Jen Lang: 00:25:01

otherwise, how do you choose which ones? You know, sometimes

Jen Lang: 00:25:05

you don't have a choice you have you have to show up for your

Jen Lang: 00:25:06

family there is like I have to show up for my dogs if I don't

Jen Lang: 00:25:09

take the dogs out well, yeah, exactly. It's an S, which I love

Jen Lang: 00:25:13

doing that. So if it's more a question of choosing the

Jen Lang: 00:25:19

activities that bring you both happiness, and fulfillment, and

Jen Lang: 00:25:26

or combining the ones, we've talked about combining those

Jen Lang: 00:25:31

different areas, so that they are more fulfilling. Yeah, or

Jen Lang: 00:25:35

choosing something completely new that meets both criteria.

Jen Lang: 00:25:39

And that makes it easier to say no to stuff and it doesn't have

Jen Lang: 00:25:43

to be no forever. This is the other part. Yes. You know, it

Jen Lang: 00:25:46

could be not right now. Like I took that conscious pause from

Jen Lang: 00:25:49

karate in September. On then I emailed them again in January. I

Jen Lang: 00:25:52

said, I'm still taking a pause until at least April. So, yeah,

Jen Lang: 00:25:57

and April, all the side, you know, okay, maybe I'll go back

Jen Lang: 00:26:01

just once a week, instead of four to four times a week.

Jane Stark: 00:26:04

Yeah. Yeah, it Yeah. And how, you know, so how is

Jane Stark: 00:26:09

that playing out? In what we're doing? Like, it's just thinking

Jane Stark: 00:26:17

about bringing that back to kind of behind the scenes. So that's

Jane Stark: 00:26:20

what's going on for us, personally, lots of shifts. And

Jane Stark: 00:26:25

I think we both agree, like, this is what we want to build.

Jane Stark: 00:26:27

Yeah. together. And so it's about really, this new level of

Jane Stark: 00:26:33

okay. That's my, that's the priority, how can I create the

Jane Stark: 00:26:37

space? And how can we kind of double down on what we're doing

Jane Stark: 00:26:41

without putting the pressure or adding more to our plate. And I

Jane Stark: 00:26:47

think that's, you know, that some of where I've seen, like,

Jane Stark: 00:26:50

I've been having to do some stuff in the cracks of my day

Jane Stark: 00:26:52

for, you know, what we're building and getting, you know,

Jane Stark: 00:26:56

our sales page built out and things like that. And I'm like,

Jane Stark: 00:27:00

what actually brings me joy and fulfillment is to have the space

Jane Stark: 00:27:03

and sit down and work on something like that, you know,

Jane Stark: 00:27:07

in the day and give it the proper energy, because I also

Jane Stark: 00:27:10

feel, I also wonder, you know, we know that our energy comes

Jane Stark: 00:27:15

through in that way. So we have to be really clear. And in that

Jane Stark: 00:27:20

right space, when we're creating,

Jen Lang: 00:27:23

yes, I'd like even the gospel of like, I wrote a love

Jen Lang: 00:27:27

letter for our community, which if you're not already signed up,

Jen Lang: 00:27:31

we'll share the love letters link. I wrote our community love

Jen Lang: 00:27:34

letter yesterday at 4am, because I was awake because of the full

Jen Lang: 00:27:38

moon. And it was, again, one of those things that I was trying

Jen Lang: 00:27:41

to fit in. And I didn't know if I was gonna do it the night

Jen Lang: 00:27:44

before. And I thought, You know what, I'm just going to call it

Jen Lang: 00:27:48

a night go to bed, did not know I was going to wake up at 4am.

Jen Lang: 00:27:53

But you know, it all worked, that part of it worked out. But

Jen Lang: 00:27:56

I just certainly don't want to make that a habit. I want that

Jen Lang: 00:27:59

time and space to write from a space of lightness and

Jen Lang: 00:28:03

expansion. Without it being four in the morning.

Jane Stark: 00:28:07

Whoo. So I think that's a good word place to

Jane Stark: 00:28:09

leave this. And then that lets like, you're going to get more

Jane Stark: 00:28:13

of us. Jen and I are I think like the what you were saying,

Jane Stark: 00:28:17

right? And how, watch for how things shift as we even shift

Jane Stark: 00:28:22

how we're going to show up for we are Jen and Jane, for this

Jane Stark: 00:28:25

podcast for all of what we're bringing to the world. Like, I

Jane Stark: 00:28:29

think, to full circle this conversation. We're both in this

Jane Stark: 00:28:32

place of right. We committed to this back in August, September.

Jane Stark: 00:28:36

We're showing you the bumps, it's not perfect. The ups and

Jane Stark: 00:28:41

downs and all the things and you know, but we're both looking to

Jane Stark: 00:28:46

create that space and show up even more fully.

Jen Lang: 00:28:48

Yeah. Oh, yeah, you're gonna see more of us. There's

Jen Lang: 00:28:50

more community calls coming. More ways to interact. Let's see

Jen Lang: 00:28:55

off the top of our head. can join us on Instagram Live at 645

Jen Lang: 00:28:59

to 7am. Monday to Friday, we hold seven minutes of silence

Jen Lang: 00:29:02

together. So we have a preamble. So just do make sure you just

Jen Lang: 00:29:05

follow us on Instagram at we are Jen and Jane just as like it

Jen Lang: 00:29:09

sounds. Community calls. You're coming up twice a month now or

Jen Lang: 00:29:13

every two weeks. Yeah, I think it's first and third Wednesday's

Jen Lang: 00:29:18

of the month.

Jane Stark: 00:29:20

And the community calls are really a to give you a

Jane Stark: 00:29:23

sample of what it's like to work with us. A sample of you know,

Jane Stark: 00:29:28

even just a mini container for the bigger container that we're

Jane Stark: 00:29:31

building with our fear serenity program, which I think both of

Jane Stark: 00:29:34

those the community call and then the bigger program are for

Jane Stark: 00:29:41

people who women a lot. It's mostly we're working with.

Jen Lang: 00:29:47

We are open to men. So if you are a listener and you

Jen Lang: 00:29:49

are male, we'd love to hear from you.

Jane Stark: 00:29:52

But some but you're on your journey. You're on your

Jane Stark: 00:29:54

healing journey or maybe on a spiritual journey. You may be

Jane Stark: 00:29:57

doing some of your own healing work. independently and are

Jane Stark: 00:30:01

looking for community are looking for. So it's, it's, it's

Jane Stark: 00:30:04

very much there's lots of support, there's like I'm with

Jane Stark: 00:30:06

my hands I'm forming, I'm talking with my hands right now

Jane Stark: 00:30:10

Taner build container. So it's very like, there's their

Jane Stark: 00:30:13

structure in that way. But this is not, it's not come and learn

Jane Stark: 00:30:17

a specific tool or a specific thing. It's come and be

Jane Stark: 00:30:20

supported, come and be in community and belonging with

Jane Stark: 00:30:23

other people who are on this journey with you. And Jen and I

Jane Stark: 00:30:27

are here to lead that. And to create that container, and to

Jane Stark: 00:30:32

share our expertise and our gifts with you. But just sort of

Jane Stark: 00:30:37

wanting to share that as to delineate between what our

Jane Stark: 00:30:40

community calls are, what of your serenity group program is,

Jane Stark: 00:30:44

versus some of the other programs that are out there?

Jen Lang: 00:30:47

Yeah, so the community calls are just like Jane said

Jen Lang: 00:30:49

that many. That's that place where you can come show up, get

Jen Lang: 00:30:53

to know us, and then fear serenity is more of a, I'd say,

Jen Lang: 00:30:58

a higher touch environment and looking at, like looking at

Jen Lang: 00:31:02

aspects of your life through the lens of fear serenity.

Jane Stark: 00:31:05

Yeah, I mean, yeah, exactly. Right. And for

Jane Stark: 00:31:07

serenity, we that's a concept that Jen and I are really

Jane Stark: 00:31:10

working on for ourselves, then. And it's different for

Jane Stark: 00:31:13

everybody. But that the idea, the framework of it, the whole

Jane Stark: 00:31:17

goal of this program is to help you identify what fear serenity

Jane Stark: 00:31:20

looks like for you, and to identify who you need to be in

Jane Stark: 00:31:24

order to embody that and what tools so we can teach you some

Jane Stark: 00:31:28

additional tools to help with that pulling out whatever tools

Jane Stark: 00:31:30

you have in your toolbox. But it is definitely a much more

Jane Stark: 00:31:33

expensive program. That way, we will probably be bringing guests

Jane Stark: 00:31:36

in. So there will be yes, there will be opportunities to learn

Jane Stark: 00:31:40

from other people and other hear other perspectives within that

Jane Stark: 00:31:43

container. Whereas the community call is about Hey, show up. You

Jane Stark: 00:31:47

want a little bit of, like, boost to feel good vibe. And you

Jane Stark: 00:31:53

know, just to maybe what's on your mind. Yeah, exactly.

Jane Stark: 00:31:56

Yesterday, we had a great conversation around boundaries.

Jane Stark: 00:31:59

Yes. In our call yesterday. So yeah, lots of really juicy

Jane Stark: 00:32:03

topics in those in those calls, and they're free and they're

Jane Stark: 00:32:06

every two weeks. So it's a great way to come and be in our space

Jane Stark: 00:32:09

in our energy and

Jen Lang: 00:32:11

we'd love to meet you. Yeah, so cool. Okay, happiness.

Jen Lang: 00:32:14

Let's wrap this up. Get this out to y'all. And I said y'all, even

Jen Lang: 00:32:18

though I'm not American, anyway. Whoo. And yell. Oh, y'all what's

Jen Lang: 00:32:23

happening to me? Okay, awesome. Good. laughs everybody, have an

Jen Lang: 00:32:28

awesome day. Take care. We'll see you next time. Thanks for

Jen Lang: 00:32:31

joining us for these conscious combos. If you're ready to dive

Jen Lang: 00:32:34

deeper head on over to we are Jen and jane.com to continue the

Jen Lang: 00:32:37

conversation.

Jane Stark: 00:32:38

If you'd love this episode, please take a moment to

Jane Stark: 00:32:41

share it with your friends or your network and leave us a

Jane Stark: 00:32:43

review by going to Apple podcasts. Find us on Instagram

Jane Stark: 00:32:46

at we are Jen and Jane and let us know what you enjoy and what

Jane Stark: 00:32:49

you would like to see more of. We'd love to hear from you.